What Not to Do When Supporting Your Young Tennis Player
As a parent, your support is vital to your child’s development in tennis. You are their first coach, biggest cheerleader, and most important role model. But sometimes, even with the best intentions, parents can unintentionally hinder their child’s growth, enjoyment, or performance. In this post, we’ll explore a few common pitfalls to avoid — so you can give your child the healthiest and most positive tennis journey possible.
1. Don’t Live Through Your Child’s Success
It’s natural to feel proud when your child wins a match or hits a great forehand. But when your identity becomes tied to their results, pressure builds — not just on you, but on them. Children can sense when they’re being evaluated instead of supported. Focus on their effort, improvement, and enjoyment rather than their performance or ranking.
Try this instead: After matches, ask open-ended questions like:
“Did you enjoy the match?” or “What did you learn today?”
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2. Don’t Coach From the Sidelines
It can be tempting to shout tips during a match, especially when you think you’re helping. But sideline coaching confuses kids, undermines their focus, and can conflict with what their coach has taught. Worse, it can create anxiety and make them feel they’re playing for your approval rather than their own growth.
Try this instead: Let your child compete independently and save your feedback for after the match — or better yet, leave it to the coach.
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3. Don’t Obsess Over Winning
Winning is great — but it’s not the most important part of junior tennis. If your child feels that their value depends on results, they may play with fear, avoid challenges, or burn out early. Tennis is a long journey, and development takes time.
Try this instead: Celebrate effort, attitude, and resilience. Teach your child to love the process, not just the podium.
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4. Don’t Compare Them to Others
Every child develops at their own pace. Comparing your child to other players can erode their confidence and motivation. Whether it’s a rival who started earlier or a teammate who’s ranked higher, comparisons only distract from your child’s own goals and progress.
Try this instead: Help your child focus on personal bests and setting their own benchmarks.
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5. Don’t Neglect the Fun
Tennis should be fun — especially for young kids. If every lesson feels like a test, every match a performance, and every car ride a debrief, the joy can disappear. A child who enjoys the sport is far more likely to stay in it and succeed long-term.
Try this instead: Keep the game playful, mix in social tennis, and celebrate their love for hitting the ball — not just their next tournament.
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Final Thoughts
Your role as a parent is not to mold a champion overnight, but to help your child grow into a confident, happy, and resilient person — on and off the court. Trust the process, partner with their coach, and above all, be the steady, supportive presence they can count on through every high and low.
Tennis is their journey — be proud to walk beside them, not push them from behind.
